Easter Eggs
by KimiruMai
Summary: Post Cell Saga. Vegeta has sworn off ever fighting again, and hardly trains at all anymore. While he muses on how pathetic his life is, Bulma comes up with a nice, subtle way to motivate her Prince, even if it's not quite what he expects. Oneshot.


**A/N: Just a lil oneshot I made for Easter. Short, but I think it's cute. Hope you guys like it.**

**Disclaimer: Food fights should have been covered in the manga/anime. That's all I have to say. (Oh, and literal fights between greedy Super Saiyans don't count.) **

**Prompt: Easter, and Indelible by Brooke Fraser**

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**Easter Eggs**

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Earthling holidays are so pointless.

St. Patricks day makes people pinch you if you aren't wearing a stupid color, Halloween is an excuse to wear something stupid, and Valentines day is just…

Stupid.

Then there's Easter.

"OH, VEGETA!"

Why me? Honestly, why can't that Woman bother someone else? I just want to sleep.

"VEGETA NO OUJIIIIIIIIII!"

What in the world possessed me to choose such a harpy of a mate?

Yes, I have come to terms with the fact that she is mine, and I suppose with the fact that I am hers, as well. Loyalty was never an issue; no, the problem had been commitment. I didn't want a family; mine hadn't turned out so well, you see, so I was in no hurry to find a woman and have her bear me a son.

And yet, here I am, with an annoying blue haired banshee that refuses to leave me be, and a purple haired son who, when in the mood, possesses a scowl that rivals my own.

He is a happy child, most of the time. I would say that he is a fair mix of the both of us, what with his mother's coloring and my features.

"PRINCE VEGETA OF THE SAIYAN RACE, IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR SAIYAN BUTT DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW I'M COMING UP AFTER YOU!"

Now she's getting irritated. Interesting.

Seconds later, the door to our – yes, _our_ – bedroom burst open. I opened my eyes and lifted my head. Bulma stood in the doorway, her fists clenched and her jaw set. Her blue eyes blazed with a heated fire, flashing with the anger she is about to unleash on me.

"Get out of bed, _now_," she said menacingly.

I rolled my eyes and dropped my head back to the pillow. "What for?"

"You've been a mess since Cell!" she screeched. "Getting up late, sitting around doing nothing…It's creepy, Vegeta! Get up and do something!"

"I don't _want_ to."

"You're depressed!" she exclaimed. "And it's driving me nuts! Get up!"

"No."

"Vegeta, it's Easter. You are going to come downstairs and make Easter eggs with me and your son. Then you are going to go train your ass off like you normally do, or something! But for God's sake, GET UP!"

I glared at her and buried my face in the soft fabric. Bulma screeched wordlessly at me, slammed the door and went back down stairs, stomping all the way.

I sighed.

Yeah, I was depressed. And for once in my life, I had no strive, no power, no want to get out of the rut I was in.

Until my wife burst into our room again and chucked a pink egg at my head.

I gasped and shot up from the bed, egg yolk dripping from my hair and making soft, sticky _splat_s on my shoulders.

"The Vegeta I know would be really pissed off right now!" she shouted at me.

My eyes widened as the blunt truth in her words slaps me in the face.

And suddenly, I _am_ pissed.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, WENCH?" I roared. "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG I'M GOING TO SMELL LIKE DEAD BABY CHICKENS? I SWEAR IF YOU EVER DO THAT AGAIN I WILL BLOW THIS STUPID MUDBALL SKY HIGH!"

She gapes at me. Then she laughs, and _ta-da_, there is another egg in her hand. It cracks on my chest, coating my abdomen with dull yellow goo.

"Woman!" I yelled, and she took off down the stairs, shrieking at the top of her lungs.

I followed her, and she dives behind Trunk's highchair in a pathetic attempt to hide. I very calmly took the boy out and sat him on the kitchen table, promptly smashing the ridiculous chair into the wall. Good ridance; it was hideous. Bulma shrieks again and throws another egg at me. I dodged it, and it made a loud crack against the counter.

I glanced around the kitchen, and upon spotting the cartons of eggs on the table, surrounded by bowls of food coloring and paint, grabbed three of them, holding them above her head.

"Vegeta, don't you _dare_!" she yelled at me.

I smirked at her, and crushed the eggs in my hand.

Hardly a nanosecond later and I find myself engaging in the first egg fight I've ever had in my life, which slightly surprises me considering who I live with. Bulma launches eggs at me like what the humans call grenades, and I'm surprised that she actually gets a few good hits in. Of course, I'm not moving at anything close to top speed, or hell, even a _quarter_ top speed, but she _is_ such a weak little creature…

The Brat giggles and squeals, somehow barely getting any egg on him at all. I glanced at him for all but two seconds, and a blue egg suddenly lands smack damn in the middle of my face.

I roared out a couple of profanities and shook my head violently, the yolk flying off my skin and landing on multiple things in the kitchen, the boy and woman included. She cracked up, pointed at me as she tries in vain to get a hold of herself. "You look like a dog," she said, sinking to the ground in a fit of giggles. "A really spikey haired, soggy, egg-y dog."

"You're more of a brat than he is, Woman," I growled, motioning to the child on the table.

"Got you out of bed, didn't it?" she asked.

I froze, and we stared at each other, silent.

Bulma sighed. "Vegeta…"

I crouched beside her and picked an eggshell from her hair. She sighed and leaned into my hand, staring at me with big, knowing blue eyes.

"I don't want you to be depressed, Vegeta," she whispered. "I know it hurts, but please, please do something with yourself. I can't stand seeing you lounging around the house like…like a human."

I chuckled halfheartedly. "What? Humans aren't good enough for you, Woman?"

She leaned forward and kissed me gently. It was almost saddening, that kiss, and yet, it was also comforting in ways I hadn't felt in years…hadn't felt at all. "The mighty Prince of Saiyans is the only one good enough for me," she said.

What great, merciful God blessed me with this beautiful creature? What good deed have I done to deserve a mate who loves me despite my transgressions, and a son destined to have power as great as my own someday? Even his future counterpart, who hardly knew me, was willing to burn for me, to be killed to save my hide, whether or not I needed it.

She pulled back, gazing at me with a small sense of awe. "I'm so proud of you, Vegeta," she said suddenly.

"Why?"

"Trunks told me what you did. When Cell killed him, I mean."

I looked away. "I didn't avenge him. Kakarot's brat did." My fist clenched. "A child was stronger than I was. I couldn't even scratch Cell."

"So what?" she asked, somewhat irritably. "Who gives a damn, if you scratched him or not? You attacked all the same, and that meant the world to Trunks, to me. It takes a real hero to charge into battle like that, Vegeta, especially when you knew he was so much stronger."

I shook my head at her. "I'm no hero, Onna, not like Kakarot. Make no mistake about that."

Bulma cupped my cheek, her hand feeling cool against my naturally hot skin. "You're a hero to me," she said. "Isn't that enough?"

It was.

I stood and pulled her to her feet. She smiled at my lack of response, as if she expected it. "Want to help me and Trunks make Easter Eggs?" she asked.

I smirked at her. "Foolish Onna. Such activities are a waste of my time. The Prince of all Saiyans has better things to do."

She huffed and put her dainty hands on her full hips as I maneuvered around her and headed for the stairs. "And just where do you think you're going?" she asked defiantly.

"To shower," I answered. "No way am I stepping foot in the GR covered in all this mess."

A giant grin bloomed over her face, and her eyes sparkled with joy.

Then, very playfully, she says, "Well, you don't have to be an _asshole_ about it!"

Females. Such an enigma.

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**A/N: Happy Easter :) **

**~KimiruMai**


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